"Was aroun dis time dat I made a bargain wid anudder kine of spirit dat changed muh tinkin sum. Sigil was full of portals, tings I ain nevah seen befoah an I guess it foun its way trew moah easy in dat place...when muh barriers were down....I put it down to da weak poshun of firewatah dat Khazeet be servin heh...made meh moah susceptibal...or mebbe I was ripe foah it..."
"I ain nevah bin afeared of da good spirits nor da presence of da dead dat can walk sometime...see sweetcheeks....most of dem be benign, but dis one got into muh head, decided to play lil game wid muh mine an it alot of willpowah ta keep it from takin ovah. I tell you sugah, you don mess wid dem kine an I was still missin much of muh ole powahs to do much else but keep it at bay. So, yessuh.....I made bargain wid dis one an I saw dat muh powah did turn from dat point on."
Bertie handed mama Jojo a fresh glass of the punch she enjoyed, then moved to stand closer to the roaring fire, his hand wandering over the shelves, fire plate and mantlepiece to touch and inspect many of the curious artifacts and objects that lay there. The lad, a budding bard and tale spinner, could feel many of the objects bearing enchantment. Jojo watched him inspect her things and in so doing, delay the questions she knew him to be burning to ask.
"Spit it out boy...you wan know bout dat spirit an how muh powah did change" and she recieved a sheepish grin from his look that followed.
"I don want to talk bout dat evil spirit jus yet...but lemme jus say dat.....muh cusses could severeleh harm if I used da powah of dat spirit, drain da watah from a body to leave it dry and widdered....dat a touch ta mend could be turned pon itself to also deal a powahful sting dat allowed meh to draw its lifeforce inta mine, leavin it weaker..mmm.... mmm.....jus look at me da wrong way sugah...an what was alive could easileh be made dead or nearer to bein a corpse....course....took a lot to get muh fire's burnin an angered nuff to be doin dat to jus anyone"
She cackled and coughed as she laughed just watching the young lad's expression turn to one of shock.
"Don worreh sweetcheeks, I won be drainin you of your body fluids honey if you don write nice of meh" she winked at the boy in jest "...no need ta look at me like dat!" she wiped her eyes as they streamed, her mirth causing her whole body to shake, spilling the punch.
The Tales Of Mama Jojo
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*Pashan01
- Posts: 304
- Joined: Thu Jan 01, 1970 12:00 am
"Twice muh keen sense of venture got dat man into trouble...yessuh....left us bot weak, him moah so...wid muh powahs sapped nutting I cud do...but lend muh arm and get him back to see da brudder sellin poshun or dat bazaar healuh. I paid foah his recovereh...yessuh...did feel a lil bit guilty bout dat..." mama Jojo took a moment to take a long gulp of her rum punch, smacked her fat lips, tasting the flavour of it, then carried on.
"But I seen it....we seen it....was not figment of muh imaginashun dat fust time...I did right to return deah....one nasteh evil spirit haunting dat place. Had da hairs on da back of muh neck stand up like a cats. We got close....reeeeal close, ambushed by undead, called upon muh own spirits to bring fort one to help us....dat man did not seem to mine dat I did dat...made me like him even moah...not many tolerate usin of da dead in dat way..." she noted Bertie was unable to hold back a shiver and she gave him a toothy grin before continuing.
"Da ambush took us hard...but we gutted dem zombies to pieces left em trailin deah parts on da boardwalk...moved fudder on and ....deah it was! " the whites of her eyes gleamed bright against her dark face, in the dim light of the room. "....surrounded by its followahs, moah spirit an undead protectin its energies...an den it came foah us. Dat sugah managed to get in a few slashes wid his chiv, I tried muh cusses out on dem ghosts, but dat evil blot of energy..."she shook her head..."....nutting...I tried again..cussin blue at it...but..nutting...."
"Powahless we was...nutting else but to run our sorreh asses out of deah. Kept him alive I did wid a spell of vigor, jus nuff to see dat honey trew da tunnels back to da sufface....dat much I cud do...was muh ideah aftah all...to go deah..."
Bertie paused in his writing, quill pen poised above the journal page, waiting for the mama to finish the tale of the adventure.
"I was not don wid dat spirit...nossuh...made it muh goal aftah dat to prime muhself...to return and see dat pile of putrid floatin piece of..." she grinned again, seeing Bertie prepare himself for an elongated cursing session, and she paused in her tirade. "Did not return straight away howevah....shared nice strong drink of whiskey wid dat sweetcheeks while recoverin...den tole him to show me dat piss-cold plane he don told me of....froze muh ass of in deah...even do I spent da last of muh gold on lil ring to help...I saw a bit befoah muh sense of adventure got us into trouble deah too! " her heavy breasts jostled as her laughter spilled forth "..got oursel chased by two ovahgrown elementals...heh...beat us up sumting bad...and we slumped to da stone floor after jumpin back trew dat portal...yessuh...I had bruises an a limp from dat one for many days...an dat honey was no bettah off..."
"Ting is..he was right....we bot needed to fine bettah armours and weapons befoah we cud make it trew dat plane any moah easileh..an I was aftah moah powah of spell...an anudder ting...I needed to learn moah fire spell like dat crazeh gurl in da bazaar who trows aroun her fire like she loves to see tings burn....if we was to be keepin anyting like warm in dat plane..."
"I was tempted to vite dat sugah wid me to share muh sauna while I warmed up an reflected on da situashun wid dat evil spirit sum moah....but I tink I got him into nuff trouble foah dat day heh...an after ensurin to bring back dat honey to his manleh self wid anudder invigoratin touch....I left him to recovah on his own."
Bertie watched mama Jojo chuckle and lick her lips at a memory and wink at him and with a slight roll of his eyes he finished up the last few sentences.
"But I seen it....we seen it....was not figment of muh imaginashun dat fust time...I did right to return deah....one nasteh evil spirit haunting dat place. Had da hairs on da back of muh neck stand up like a cats. We got close....reeeeal close, ambushed by undead, called upon muh own spirits to bring fort one to help us....dat man did not seem to mine dat I did dat...made me like him even moah...not many tolerate usin of da dead in dat way..." she noted Bertie was unable to hold back a shiver and she gave him a toothy grin before continuing.
"Da ambush took us hard...but we gutted dem zombies to pieces left em trailin deah parts on da boardwalk...moved fudder on and ....deah it was! " the whites of her eyes gleamed bright against her dark face, in the dim light of the room. "....surrounded by its followahs, moah spirit an undead protectin its energies...an den it came foah us. Dat sugah managed to get in a few slashes wid his chiv, I tried muh cusses out on dem ghosts, but dat evil blot of energy..."she shook her head..."....nutting...I tried again..cussin blue at it...but..nutting...."
"Powahless we was...nutting else but to run our sorreh asses out of deah. Kept him alive I did wid a spell of vigor, jus nuff to see dat honey trew da tunnels back to da sufface....dat much I cud do...was muh ideah aftah all...to go deah..."
Bertie paused in his writing, quill pen poised above the journal page, waiting for the mama to finish the tale of the adventure.
"I was not don wid dat spirit...nossuh...made it muh goal aftah dat to prime muhself...to return and see dat pile of putrid floatin piece of..." she grinned again, seeing Bertie prepare himself for an elongated cursing session, and she paused in her tirade. "Did not return straight away howevah....shared nice strong drink of whiskey wid dat sweetcheeks while recoverin...den tole him to show me dat piss-cold plane he don told me of....froze muh ass of in deah...even do I spent da last of muh gold on lil ring to help...I saw a bit befoah muh sense of adventure got us into trouble deah too! " her heavy breasts jostled as her laughter spilled forth "..got oursel chased by two ovahgrown elementals...heh...beat us up sumting bad...and we slumped to da stone floor after jumpin back trew dat portal...yessuh...I had bruises an a limp from dat one for many days...an dat honey was no bettah off..."
"Ting is..he was right....we bot needed to fine bettah armours and weapons befoah we cud make it trew dat plane any moah easileh..an I was aftah moah powah of spell...an anudder ting...I needed to learn moah fire spell like dat crazeh gurl in da bazaar who trows aroun her fire like she loves to see tings burn....if we was to be keepin anyting like warm in dat plane..."
"I was tempted to vite dat sugah wid me to share muh sauna while I warmed up an reflected on da situashun wid dat evil spirit sum moah....but I tink I got him into nuff trouble foah dat day heh...an after ensurin to bring back dat honey to his manleh self wid anudder invigoratin touch....I left him to recovah on his own."
Bertie watched mama Jojo chuckle and lick her lips at a memory and wink at him and with a slight roll of his eyes he finished up the last few sentences.
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*Pashan01
- Posts: 304
- Joined: Thu Jan 01, 1970 12:00 am
"Seemed one ladeh tink I was competishun foah dat sugah's affecshuns, I did not dissuade her from dat tinkin...stead....foun it amusin to lead her on sum...she was soreleh misguided in tinkin muh arms had been roun dat honey already....trew his arm touchin yessuh...but not roun him...heh..not den......doh can not say I were not entireleh uninterested...but....it was fightin talk at dat...so I challenged her to a mudwrestle...doh by her dirteh face, look like she already been amusin hersel on dat score...she did not tek up muh challenge, tole me were not her kind of fight...an wid muh bosom and rib still black an blue from dat elemental whoppin...I felt lazeh an was moah interested in relaxin den fightin dat gurl muhsel.."
"But dat fightin talk turned to laughtuh...dat gurl had keen sense of humour dat I liked an flirtatious nature like muh own....so we sparred words...wid dat sweetcheeks Lance standin tween us probableh wonderin wat da hells was goin on...foun sum muh ole rydum an stride in dat sparrin...."
Bertie let out a sigh of frustration "But...what of the adventure against that evil spirit?" he pushed his question determinedly, desperately trying to change the subject.
"Hey...you get all muh tales suh...don rush meh now...you wanted da life an times of da great mama Jojo....show sum patience boy...I can still whop youah ass suh!" her fiercer manner suitably quashed the young lads impatience and but if he had looked more closely instead of hanging his head, he would have noticed the glint of the tease to her dark orbs.
"Now wheah was I?...ah yessuh...dat honey of a man was still feelin uptight to meh...dat gurl challenged him of bein shy...which he naturalleh rejected....heh he did not seem da shy type from wat I had so far seen.....but he countered wid da word 'modest'...which is moah likeleh true...but...I felt he was soreleh in need of a lil of muh craft to be relaxin...so I gave to him sum spare mojo balls, got him to hole dem and warm dem to his palm....dat sugah was slow to get used to da feel of dem which suprised meh given dat mos men I knows a lil ball handlin ain nutting new to dem....an dat gurl accused meh den of makin dirteh heh....but she got meh all wrong...tole her was part of muh craft...les face it....all da dirt on her face....she was da dirteh one" but the mama did wink at the young lad even so.
"She seemed interested in udder parts of muh busness...but I was not goin to be tellin dat gurl of all muh intenshuns and craft now was I?....fust, I had to be mekkin sum gold...den I cud afford to set up muh busness propah..."
"Deah were many aroun dat bar...an anudder lush honey wid a lil tache to his lip came sat closeby caught muh eye but...I needed to hit dat sauna and treat dem bruises again wid a poshun....befoah I wud be attemptin anudder huntin of dat spirit"
Bertie looked up then, hearing the words he wanted and was rewarded with one of her pearly white toothy grins.
"But dat fightin talk turned to laughtuh...dat gurl had keen sense of humour dat I liked an flirtatious nature like muh own....so we sparred words...wid dat sweetcheeks Lance standin tween us probableh wonderin wat da hells was goin on...foun sum muh ole rydum an stride in dat sparrin...."
Bertie let out a sigh of frustration "But...what of the adventure against that evil spirit?" he pushed his question determinedly, desperately trying to change the subject.
"Hey...you get all muh tales suh...don rush meh now...you wanted da life an times of da great mama Jojo....show sum patience boy...I can still whop youah ass suh!" her fiercer manner suitably quashed the young lads impatience and but if he had looked more closely instead of hanging his head, he would have noticed the glint of the tease to her dark orbs.
"Now wheah was I?...ah yessuh...dat honey of a man was still feelin uptight to meh...dat gurl challenged him of bein shy...which he naturalleh rejected....heh he did not seem da shy type from wat I had so far seen.....but he countered wid da word 'modest'...which is moah likeleh true...but...I felt he was soreleh in need of a lil of muh craft to be relaxin...so I gave to him sum spare mojo balls, got him to hole dem and warm dem to his palm....dat sugah was slow to get used to da feel of dem which suprised meh given dat mos men I knows a lil ball handlin ain nutting new to dem....an dat gurl accused meh den of makin dirteh heh....but she got meh all wrong...tole her was part of muh craft...les face it....all da dirt on her face....she was da dirteh one" but the mama did wink at the young lad even so.
"She seemed interested in udder parts of muh busness...but I was not goin to be tellin dat gurl of all muh intenshuns and craft now was I?....fust, I had to be mekkin sum gold...den I cud afford to set up muh busness propah..."
"Deah were many aroun dat bar...an anudder lush honey wid a lil tache to his lip came sat closeby caught muh eye but...I needed to hit dat sauna and treat dem bruises again wid a poshun....befoah I wud be attemptin anudder huntin of dat spirit"
Bertie looked up then, hearing the words he wanted and was rewarded with one of her pearly white toothy grins.
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*Pashan01
- Posts: 304
- Joined: Thu Jan 01, 1970 12:00 am
"Lots of people I bumped into goin on adventure. Many's da time I headed to test muhsel on da evil spirits of dat unnergroun lake dock and cultists in dat temple."
"One time was wid da tree Jo's heh...was muhsel, dis soljer type Joe, sturdeh fellow, fully plated and good to have at da front...Jo, dat be Joxan, da tached honey wid da bronzed skin, real charma....an was a lil ladeh in robe wid us too, Tria her name, seemed innocent type, nice doh."
"Wid da powah an muscle an good huntin tactic, dese tree an muhself we whopped da ass of....heh heh....ah wait now.....ain no ass on dem tings....whopped da energies of da evil wrait dat held da last pier. Was pleased wid muhsel foah da contribushun I made to dat huntin parteh, but we all brought sumting useful, even dat lil gurl's boot hurtin and breakin bones of skeletons was wortwhile."
"I kept returnin to dat temple...sumting bout it had muh hackles up...now I ain no sain' sugah..." she grins to Bertie "...but aftah a few times deah, explorin all da rooms an side chambers, finally nearin to hold a map of dat place in muh head, I foun purpose in returnin, hard doh it was... an I wanted help to do dat each time, could not do it muhsel, not fight an do muh spirit work...an I called upon muh growin group of frens to join me in dat purpose....or least allow meh to do wat I felt necessareh"
"Fust was dat Lance sugah. I met up wid dat one-eyed honey Fargul....did I tell you bout him befoah? No? ah... I'll get roun to dat one latah....we was sharin tale an sum rum punch an dat sugah Lance join us.....was in muh elemen' sittin tween dem two sweetcheeks I can tell you heh.." chuckling, she winks to Bertie "...well....dat Lance an I, we made date to venture to temple soon aftah..." But Mama Jojo paused in her tale.
"Hang on....I got to take meh a lil break heah....da punch be goin trew fast dis day...." She struggled to get up in her seat, Bertie watched her heave her great body out of the chair and shuffle out of the room.
"One time was wid da tree Jo's heh...was muhsel, dis soljer type Joe, sturdeh fellow, fully plated and good to have at da front...Jo, dat be Joxan, da tached honey wid da bronzed skin, real charma....an was a lil ladeh in robe wid us too, Tria her name, seemed innocent type, nice doh."
"Wid da powah an muscle an good huntin tactic, dese tree an muhself we whopped da ass of....heh heh....ah wait now.....ain no ass on dem tings....whopped da energies of da evil wrait dat held da last pier. Was pleased wid muhsel foah da contribushun I made to dat huntin parteh, but we all brought sumting useful, even dat lil gurl's boot hurtin and breakin bones of skeletons was wortwhile."
"I kept returnin to dat temple...sumting bout it had muh hackles up...now I ain no sain' sugah..." she grins to Bertie "...but aftah a few times deah, explorin all da rooms an side chambers, finally nearin to hold a map of dat place in muh head, I foun purpose in returnin, hard doh it was... an I wanted help to do dat each time, could not do it muhsel, not fight an do muh spirit work...an I called upon muh growin group of frens to join me in dat purpose....or least allow meh to do wat I felt necessareh"
"Fust was dat Lance sugah. I met up wid dat one-eyed honey Fargul....did I tell you bout him befoah? No? ah... I'll get roun to dat one latah....we was sharin tale an sum rum punch an dat sugah Lance join us.....was in muh elemen' sittin tween dem two sweetcheeks I can tell you heh.." chuckling, she winks to Bertie "...well....dat Lance an I, we made date to venture to temple soon aftah..." But Mama Jojo paused in her tale.
"Hang on....I got to take meh a lil break heah....da punch be goin trew fast dis day...." She struggled to get up in her seat, Bertie watched her heave her great body out of the chair and shuffle out of the room.
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*Pashan01
- Posts: 304
- Joined: Thu Jan 01, 1970 12:00 am
"I tole her...'I may be called da mama...but I ain youah mama'...I tink she got da message....she was one crazeh chile, unhinged in da head...but..don tink she have bad bone in her bodeh..jus keen on seekin a mudder figuh an was searchin foah her own affecshun an attenshun...an she shoah liked dem hugs...an give her one shoah enuff" Mama Jojo recounted to Bertie.
"We was treesum goin to dat temple....dat gurl Yasher...she nevah stop rushin...we let her get all da doors and see ahead....an dat honey Lance...finaleh made it trew all dose rooms to dat lil one...wheah many bones did lie. I did muh ting...raised one to animashun an called to its spirit to be joinin us...den headed out slowleh, lettin dat sugah take guard to see us safeleh trew."
"Found nice spot once out dem sewer, a good place to let da spirit meet bone again in ritual...befoah it went on...see boy...sum dem dead was not bad souls...was taken from life by dose cultist....muh task to sort out da bad from da good...dose spirit wordeh of rejoinin deah brudders and sistuhs I let pass...udders...I bargained wid da greatuh powah to take to his own...dey were not wordeh of moah...cud cuss dem to da hells foah all I cared..." Bertie swallowed, dry of mouth at this revelation but then caught up with the shift in her tale and almost wished he hadn't.
"...yessuh....an...afta neah freezin to deat in da nex advencha in ice plane...I...finaleh neah got da close off of dat man heh heh..mmm...mmmm...in a nice relaxin hot sonna..."
"We was treesum goin to dat temple....dat gurl Yasher...she nevah stop rushin...we let her get all da doors and see ahead....an dat honey Lance...finaleh made it trew all dose rooms to dat lil one...wheah many bones did lie. I did muh ting...raised one to animashun an called to its spirit to be joinin us...den headed out slowleh, lettin dat sugah take guard to see us safeleh trew."
"Found nice spot once out dem sewer, a good place to let da spirit meet bone again in ritual...befoah it went on...see boy...sum dem dead was not bad souls...was taken from life by dose cultist....muh task to sort out da bad from da good...dose spirit wordeh of rejoinin deah brudders and sistuhs I let pass...udders...I bargained wid da greatuh powah to take to his own...dey were not wordeh of moah...cud cuss dem to da hells foah all I cared..." Bertie swallowed, dry of mouth at this revelation but then caught up with the shift in her tale and almost wished he hadn't.
"...yessuh....an...afta neah freezin to deat in da nex advencha in ice plane...I...finaleh neah got da close off of dat man heh heh..mmm...mmmm...in a nice relaxin hot sonna..."
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*Pashan01
- Posts: 304
- Joined: Thu Jan 01, 1970 12:00 am
"I tink muh nomad blood was showin at times when da mama wud jus go off an xplore dem planes for many days....but at udder times...Bertie sugah...you nevah did see anyone as lazeh as muhsel..." her plump fingers waggled at the young lad, her wizened face jovial in expression.
"Had dem best intenshuns to start up muh business soon enuff...but nevah cud fine muhsel wid dat gold to get dat sorted...wud sooner stan at dat bar wid da likes of dat honey Lance or anudder catchin up wid talks an drinkin dat rum firewatah...it was goin to happen...just nevah rushed to it...life was foah enjoyin and relaxin too honey...dat was muh tinkin in Sigil."
"Why run wenchew can sit, sit wenchew can lie, worry wenchew can relax, frown wenchew can laugh, hate wenchew can looove" mama Jojo winked at Bertie "..unless sumone make me mad dat is...but was hard job to get me into dat state....piteh da sonoffabitch who make da mama mad...das foah shoah" she chuckled, her pendulous breasts bobbing the mojo bag that sat nestling between.
"Had meh a few lil runs back to dat temple bringin moah spirit an bone back ...one time was wid tree hansum men..mmm mmmm...did I enjoy muhself?....I tink you know answer to dat...an one dose honeys walked wid meh to dat hot Abyss anudder day. Was da fust proper time I stayed foah any len of time deah but dis time I cud preciate his own powah gainst muh own.....seemed he had bargain wid dem spirits too...but he used dem in different ways....he chose to hole spirit of dead warrior bound to him and helpin him trew dat place an to fortify hissel wid different separate powers when I liked da all empowerin one of da animal...seemed to work fine honey...an togedder mmm mmm...we brought down few dem great hulkin brutes of demon and debils...wanted to ask him to join meh foah sonna aftah...but dat man wud not even tell meh weah he came from...sort dat needed loosen up a bit, stop tinkin danger roun everyrah conner...an not from da mama les he make her mad.....a sonna wud help dat, relax dat uptight sugah...but he was not bitin...not den heh..."
"Had dem best intenshuns to start up muh business soon enuff...but nevah cud fine muhsel wid dat gold to get dat sorted...wud sooner stan at dat bar wid da likes of dat honey Lance or anudder catchin up wid talks an drinkin dat rum firewatah...it was goin to happen...just nevah rushed to it...life was foah enjoyin and relaxin too honey...dat was muh tinkin in Sigil."
"Why run wenchew can sit, sit wenchew can lie, worry wenchew can relax, frown wenchew can laugh, hate wenchew can looove" mama Jojo winked at Bertie "..unless sumone make me mad dat is...but was hard job to get me into dat state....piteh da sonoffabitch who make da mama mad...das foah shoah" she chuckled, her pendulous breasts bobbing the mojo bag that sat nestling between.
"Had meh a few lil runs back to dat temple bringin moah spirit an bone back ...one time was wid tree hansum men..mmm mmmm...did I enjoy muhself?....I tink you know answer to dat...an one dose honeys walked wid meh to dat hot Abyss anudder day. Was da fust proper time I stayed foah any len of time deah but dis time I cud preciate his own powah gainst muh own.....seemed he had bargain wid dem spirits too...but he used dem in different ways....he chose to hole spirit of dead warrior bound to him and helpin him trew dat place an to fortify hissel wid different separate powers when I liked da all empowerin one of da animal...seemed to work fine honey...an togedder mmm mmm...we brought down few dem great hulkin brutes of demon and debils...wanted to ask him to join meh foah sonna aftah...but dat man wud not even tell meh weah he came from...sort dat needed loosen up a bit, stop tinkin danger roun everyrah conner...an not from da mama les he make her mad.....a sonna wud help dat, relax dat uptight sugah...but he was not bitin...not den heh..."